D O U B T | My #ButterflyTransition Story (Part 2)

D O U B T | My #ButterflyTransition Story (Part 2)

D O U B T | My #ButterflyTransition Story (Part 2)

DOUBT | Being uncertain about the outcome of possibly becoming a success, that you don’t even try. If nothing beats a fail but a try, then not trying at all automatically signs you up to fail. Doubting your potential success could leave you standing in the same place forever. Why do I know this? because I doubted myself a little too long for comfort.  

I questioned my power, my purpose, and even my voice.  Allowing doubt to raise the smallest of uncertainties had me questioning if I had truly won my battle against depression.  I was starting to question if I could be the Diana I aspired to be, the one I was when no one was watching. Now, the crazy thing about Doubt is that it doesn’t have the crippling hold on you like fear does, but if you allow it to simmer too long you begin to believe the darkness it brings about your light.

I had done the work. I survived one of the darkest hours in my life, I had won, but doubt wasn’t willing to let me go so easily, it stayed by my side waiting to be my comfort as I stepped out of my transition.

I am an author, but what if I’m just a woman who wrote some thing on paper? I am an author, but I feel like an imposter among other authors. I am an author, but my book isn’t on anyone’s best seller list and I question if it will be. That’s what doubt told me. My fight with what I was becoming and what I questioned was real.

After writing my first book, Butterfly Transition, I fell into many doubts of whether my book was good enough, would be understood, was written and edited well enough to be taken seriously. I doubted my own journey, like how is this book going to change anyone’s life, you’re barely any different after the book, and you wrote it.

The words we tell ourselves can be some of the most damaging things you’ll ever hear. Why? Because you know your secrets, and you know your fears. Your doubts are nothing more than your fears repackaged to tell you the opposite of what could be. They appear so real that they can stop the strongest person in their tracks from greatness. They stopped me from my own. From releasing my book, to speaking and going on tour.  I doubted that the outcome would ever be a real success. I questioned every move and hesitated to embody the person who was free from Fear & Doubt, because I wasn’t, not truly.

3 things I did to remove doubt:

  1. WHY out your doubt? I got my closest friend to ask me why after I verbalized my doubts. She asked me why until I couldn’t find a reason or excuse to not do what I wanted to do. It was annoying and irritating, I felt uncomfortable as I tried to come up with ways around her why, but it worked. Asking why you doubted yourself and coming up with answers kind of proved how ridiculous my doubts were. They became powerless.
  2. Take 1 step that is opposite of your doubt: It’s easy to see the opposite of something negative. I made a step towards being more positive as doubts and uncertainty lean on negative behavior and mental blocks.
  3. Believe in the outcome more than the doubt: I had to increase the belief in myself more than believing in the doubt that was crippling me.

My battle with doubt during my transition felt like I was losing my grip with reality. How could I be the person others could see, but question if I was making an impact? I doubted my gift, light, and talent to be the change I wanted to see in the world. I slowly realized no one was about doubt and uncertainty. Many struggle in silence, while I was learning how to tell people my story and use their encouragement to pull me out.

I learned how to turn down the voice of doubt as I continued to work on myself. I have come to understand that doubting your abilities is a choice. So you must choose wisely.

Stick around as I tell my #ButterflyTransition story. Before you go answer the Transition Question:

Have you ever doubted yourself and your abilities? If so how did you fight to rid yourself from doubts hold?

Yours in Transition,

DRR

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